It sucks that people are trying to make you feel that way. But you know you have to give yourself time.
Or fuck it, don't even learn it. You're an Angel of the Lord, you don't owe anyone shit. Don't forget that. You're epic, and if you don't meet their expectations, well then, they probably have stupid fucking expectations to begin with, you know?
We're often expected to be as we are in movies and television. That we fight, or become frustrated or confused, prompts reactions one wouldn't give toward a human displaying such emotions.
We're punished for not being adult enough, and treated like children. Our actions don't have the same consequences as adults do, so we're treated like when we're upset, it's over trivial matters, even though it may feel important or even devastating to us. But when we do behave badly enough that there start to be long term consequences, it's like we somehow should have known it after all.
For me, it mostly meant being ignored. My parents were really upset that I was dating this guy they didn't like, like that was going to fuck my life up so bad, when I'd been self-harming for years, you know? They only saw what they wanted to see, what they thought they could handle, as long as I wasn't visibly fucked up, getting good grades and not seeing the wrong kind of boy, I could screw off.
[She slips it in quietly, but she hasn't actually- talked about this to anyone else, willingly. But she trusts him.]
no subject
Date: 2011-12-26 01:51 am (UTC)[Instructing, firmly.]
You may have a better perspective on the bigger picture, but I know being human.
no subject
Date: 2011-12-28 01:04 am (UTC)Being human is complicated.
no subject
Date: 2011-12-28 03:31 am (UTC)Um. If you have any questions about your humanity, you know you can ask me, right?
no subject
Date: 2011-12-29 12:12 am (UTC)It is appreciated.
I seem to be expected to know everything.
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Date: 2011-12-29 12:21 am (UTC)Or fuck it, don't even learn it. You're an Angel of the Lord, you don't owe anyone shit. Don't forget that. You're epic, and if you don't meet their expectations, well then, they probably have stupid fucking expectations to begin with, you know?
no subject
Date: 2011-12-29 03:40 am (UTC)We're often expected to be as we are in movies and television. That we fight, or become frustrated or confused, prompts reactions one wouldn't give toward a human displaying such emotions.
no subject
Date: 2011-12-29 04:15 am (UTC)[She promises, with a sigh.]
no subject
Date: 2011-12-31 01:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-12-31 02:07 am (UTC)For me, it mostly meant being ignored. My parents were really upset that I was dating this guy they didn't like, like that was going to fuck my life up so bad, when I'd been self-harming for years, you know? They only saw what they wanted to see, what they thought they could handle, as long as I wasn't visibly fucked up, getting good grades and not seeing the wrong kind of boy, I could screw off.
[She slips it in quietly, but she hasn't actually- talked about this to anyone else, willingly. But she trusts him.]
no subject
Date: 2011-12-31 03:27 am (UTC)It is still a surprise, at times, how selfish some can be.
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Date: 2011-12-31 03:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-02 02:41 am (UTC)That seems counter-intuitive.
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Date: 2012-01-02 03:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-02 04:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-02 06:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-03 10:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-04 02:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-04 07:08 am (UTC)Jo is not a teenager.
no subject
Date: 2012-01-04 10:00 pm (UTC)